I was talking to Kevin and John about girls last night. Lol. It's not like I'm antisocial or completely not compatible, but Kevin just described that I don't throw myself out there, I act like I have nothing to show, nothing to prove. I agree, I guess.
I've never been one to suck up to people to get to know them. I've always gotten to know the people I've gotten to know. For some reason, things don't quite operate that way for me in college. The first time you meet me, I'm quiet. I stand confident, but I'm not the center of attention, I don't have the funniest jokes, nor do I have the most intriguing stories. But I don't mind, I don't think I have to. I'm not trying to prove myself to anyone.
Because I'm not. Let the Shiau's and David Bai crack the jokes, let James tell the stories. The difference is back in Delaware, I got to know people naturally. Nothing was forced, things happened and I got to know people. Not to say I never tell stories or crack jokes, but only if it comes naturally. I don't know, I haven't thought this through yet.
I've tried to make a conscious effort to really spend time with people I don't know, but it just doesn't work for me. I can't start a good conversation with someone as much as I can't prolong it. I can't create these things, these things just happen.
So, I've got nothing to prove. I look at the girls at Northwestern, and I can honestly say there's not one that I'm interested in dating. Yeah, I actually know a good amount of freshmen girls but I can't see myself in a relationship with them. Sophomore and junior girls...literally none. Seniors girls...too old.
And I'm not about to go into any relationship just to try it. I'm not desperate for a girl at the moment, so I guess it's okay. I just don't see any potential girls here, and that's what worries me. Whatever. Time will tell.
I'm grateful for Bobb guys.
