>>Draw a window on the front of you notebook
>>Whenever you open it, ask yourself, "Am I willing to be open?"
Open to what, I initially thought. Taking in ideas without questioning them? I'm not going to blindly take anything the speaker says. But as I thought about it more, the more it made sense.
This idea from two months ago comes back to me because of something that happened in small group today. We were planning an outreach event and we were trying to brainstorm. Honestly, I wasn't super ecstatic about the idea that we were talking about - open forums, talking to others about usually-silent topics.
When LK (please don't try to figure out who's in my SG and who LK is) started saying things like, "You guys can plan this, but I won't be a part of it."
Usually a person with little opinions suddenly had such a strong opinion. LK didn't want to talk to people about these topics or any topics really. We tried to see why LK had this opinion? Did LK have a bad experience, does LK not think it'll work?
LK wouldn't budge. LK mentioned how LK has these type of discussions all the time in his philosophy class and LK never participates. Wouldn't answer why.
As my SGL and I tried to dig deeper and find out reasons behind his opinion, LK became defensive. "I don't get why we are focusing on me and not the brainstorming for the event. Is this the point of small group? To probe people's lives?
Why do you care?"
We didn't ask any tough questions or push into any ideas, we simply just asked why. I guess that was too much for this opinion LK so strongly held.
But I don't mean to put LK on the spot, I really don't. But it was such a good example. We were trying to plan an event where Christians and non-Christians can come together and discuss things. No hair-pulling, no persuasion, but just simply telling each other their side of the story and coming to respect each other's opinions. As my SGL said, immediately dismissing someone's opinion is not the same thing as disagreeing but respecting one's opinion. And we tried to understand LK's opinion, but someone how he was so offset by the idea already that he refused.
I didn't dare say this at the time, but I wanted to say, "I care because I don't think it's healthy. I care for the benefit of you." As nice as that sounds, it's definitely not the easiest thing to take in.
I think we all do this. We pick and choose what to follow. We are open to some things, but not other things. Will I be open? Will I be open to challenges that might hurt and be embarrassing but benefit me, make me stronger? Will I be open to others ideas, or will I write it off immediately as this or that? Am I so proud that I think my way of thinking is superior to all others?
Phil 3
...but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you not only look to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
This topic has so much more potential.
- what does is the purpose of SG, really
- how far to push/challenge someone
- and more about being open, vulnerable, intentional
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