tell me a story

‘A need to tell and hear stories is essential to the species Homo sapiens,’ wrote the American novelist Reynolds Price in the essay ‘A Single Meaning’ (1978). ‘[It is] second in necessity apparently after nourishment and before love and shelter. Millions survive without love or home, almost none in silence.’

-Aeon magazine, "Tell Me a Story"

"This is how we negotiate our past"

"Only after I grew older, when my life had built its own slim back-story, did I begin to see how vitally the present is inflected by the past, and how much of my grandfather lived on in me. This is how we negotiate our past: we fumble with it, discard it, pick it up again, trying to see what new things it can tell us about ourselves, always hoping that it is never too late to learn."

- Aeon Magazine, "The Wanderer"

todo

• hike Shenandoah National Park

a man

is a person who takes responsibility for not only himself but for others.

And I've failed that to you, and I'm sorry.

couldn't sleep

because I had something to write.

Now I'm here and I don't want to write it. Or sleep.
Problems...hoping to wake up early and drive to Delaware tomorrow morning.

polymathic

"We doctor our CVs to make it look as if all we ever wanted to do was sell mobile homes or Nespresso machines. It’s common sense, isn’t it, to try to create the impression that we are entirely focused on the job we want?" - Robert Twigger 

Recently I've been reading more, because frankly there isn't much to do when I come home. My mom tells me I should be practicing my expertise; I guess I'm considered an expert at computer science now, but I'd rather do other things. Video games are fun and have their place, but reading is discovery and enlightenment...and I don't feel guilty when I read too much.

Anyway, I came across this article, talking about polymaths - people of wide-ranging knowledge, and how people with much breadth to their knowledge were the ones who pushed the edges of technology. But not so anymore. I think college students know this to be especially true. If you want to know how to get an internship in college, honest the answer is "fake it until you make it." Whenever you start your internship search, whether freshmen or sophomore year, just gear your entire fucking resume like all you ever wanted to do in your life is _____. Design, program, practice medicine, whatever you want to land your internship in.

Like you're suppose to know what you want out of life when you're 19. Truly, there are 50 and 60 year olds asking themselves what they want, but these people want teens who know they are sure. The author of the article names some examples: Francis Crick, who worked out the structure of DNA, was a physicist. Studies done by UCSB show that dancing, music and acting actually improve learning more than anything else.

I remember when Billy and I used to say that it takes a genuine genius to be a criminal mastermind, and I still stand by that statement. When you're trying to commit a high crime, it takes a lot to commit it successfully. A multitude of aggregated little bits of knowledge here and mastery of multiple arts and trades -- they don't teach you how to rob a casino in college.

But don't just pick up a hobby. Polymaths are masters of multiple areas. The author provides some encouragement, saying he was originally behind the belief that people stop learning after a certain age, but even studies show that this is false.

"Deep down I was pessimistic that I could actually learn a martial art. I thought you were either a ‘natural’ or nothing. Then I saw natural athletes fall behind when they didn’t practice enough. This, shamefully, was a great morale booster."

(basically just read this instead of this post.)

so much for sleeping early

good night.

tomorrow, we strive for more.

we are the richest

My dad the other day played a classic music song on his iPhone with Youtube the other day. He reclined on the couch, absorbing the music in peace.

That must've been what so many "rich" people did when the record player first came out and they were able to play music at home. It's a strange thought -- that the life we experience now is more "pleasure-filled" than any human experienced maybe 100 years ago.

Maybe a handful of people traveled the world back then. Most either stayed in the same country or made one move from one to another. Someone who has visited more than two continents was extremely rare back then, probably only limited to sailors who spent their lives on a ship months at a time. We have more entertainment, quicker and cheaper access, better access to food, more available hobbies, better transportation (cars, buses, trains, planes), and so much more.

Yet are we happier than those that came before us? Do we have more inner peace?

So careful with wanderlust and pleasure-seeking. Not to say that we should become cavemen again (although I do have that desire sometimes), but don't look for these things to give you happiness and peace.

Yours truly is quite guilty of this.

hot and cold

In my mind (and I guess others' too), there seems to be greater respect for the Christians who had a dark past life. I read an article about a Christian artist who used to be a drug dealer. And honestly, praise God. It's a true inspiration when I hear those stories. At the same time, I wonder why the "raised Christian" testimonies aren't as impressive or, I might even say, inspiring. Which is quite a dangerous thing to say, but in my mind, it's true.

Now, I know this doesn't mean all of us should go out and sell drugs so that we can have an amazing testimony when we relapse and find Jesus in jail 10 years from now. But still, it peaks at my mind. Perhaps because the one who has experienced greater despair is more appreciative of Christ, while many "raised Christian" folk are more likely to be lukewarm.

The traditional path. Scary how I could have guessed my college career -- I'll probably join a college fellowship, take on leadership, join the praise team, get internships, and get a job. Even worse, that was probably my ideal path/goal entering college.

Not that any of those things are bad. On campus fellowships are essential (AAIV included), but do something different. Christ destroyed norms. He isn't impressed with comfortable and traditional paths and neither are the nonchristians.

last one

i promise.

i'm dying to longboard..snowboard..something.

this foot injury is really getting to me.

public

okay.

just reset my phone because it was acting weird.

redownloaded apps.

changed facebook privacy settings.

found a solution to world peace in my head while taking a shower.

...but i forgot it when i stepped out.

good night.

if i have not love, then i have nothing at all

family

"You don't speak of your brother very often, do you?"

hm...

i should stop using facebook..

carecards

Strange how you write a few of these and they start sounding the same.

Not because you're being lazy and writing the same things to save time, but because we all struggle with the same things.

o'er oregon

Let me go back over Oregon

that little scar is nothin’ 

in the arms of all the things have yet to come. 

I’d like to call it no big deal

but we both know I’d be lying

I can never come back if I don’t go

weak

Most times, I'm pissed that I don't thrive in a single area. I always seem to be lacking, even in areas I do see success. But maybe that's a good thing, in that all I really know to run back to is Christ. I can't run to compsci, small group leading, my friendship ability, guitar, drumming, my relationship ability, etc....

Maybe I should consider myself blessed for that.

Yet, I don't run back most of the time.

I'm like a little child who tries to run away from home, even though he knows he really has no where to go other than home -- but the child refuses to walk back, still.

"Bind my wandering heart to thee..."

delaware

something about this place just makes me feel right.