i remember pastor peter talking about suffering during fall quarter.

What suffering comes down to is a single question: can you live in the mystery of a Good god? A God that knows far more than you, is far greater than you, far more holy and more trustworthy?

Can you live in that mystery?
Can I live in that mystery?

I remember sitting through those sermons being so blessed, but life was going pretty swell at the time. Of course, the last sermon was the day after the Newtown shootings.

It all seemed so quick. Every week was a struggle with her, and in mind an accomplishment. I guess I still think it's amazing that we ended our relationship on the terms that it did, and not for communication problems, or too many differences, or not enough time, or simply a lack of interest. I suppose I should be thankful for that.

But it seemed like it was looking up. Seemed like it was about to get better, and maybe our relationship would finally take a step forward.

I guess that's another reason why I'm so confused about this all. It was such a brash decision.